Miss Taygete’s Sweet Sister’s Society (The Spinster’s Society) (A Regency Romance Book) Page 9
Taygete felt calmed by his nearness, his touch, and the softness in his eyes. She took a breath and then another before saying, “I’ve forgotten what I wished to say.” She thought taking her hands back would help, but when she tried, he wouldn’t let her go.
“You didn’t like the way I spoke to Alcyone.”
“Yes! I mean, no, I didn’t.”
His thumb moved over the back of her hand. “Well, as you know, you and your sisters are my responsibility. Your brother placed you into my care. and I’ll do what I must to see that you all have a pleasant, but safe, Season.”
His hands moved up her bare arms, and she shivered down to her toes, wondering how he expected her to think when he continued to touch her. Gooseflesh rose, and the room grew warm around her.
“Stop touching me,” she whispered.
“Why?” His expression was blank.
“It’s not right. It’s too familiar.”
His hands moved up her shoulders. “But I’m your brother-in-law. We are family, according to our laws.” His hands skimmed up her neck, fingers trailing her skin.
She closed her eyes and placed her hands on his chest as she tried to gather her thoughts.
Finally, words came to her. “What are you—?“
“All it takes is a look.”
She opened her eyes. “What?”
His eyes were so warm. “You know that all it takes is a look. Do you remember the one we shared?”
He was speaking about Alcyone and Samuel Fortiere.
A look.
Like the one she’d shared with Hugh.
She would never forget that moment in the garden and was slightly offended that he would ask. He had to know. She’d built her entire life off that look. Her every moment was a direct result of their first meeting.
He must have seen it in her eyes. The truth was there. His hands moved up to her hair, and he leaned closer. His eyes fell to her mouth. “Do you recall what I did after that look?”
Her hands relaxed on his chest as her heart began to race. She didn’t know what was happening. The moment seemed surreal, but common sense and the walls she’d been building since the moment he’d walked away from her made her speak her next words. “I told you I was Maia.”
Every trace of softness left his face, and his hands tightened on her. “You know I didn’t care who you were.”
She returned pressure to his chest. “Then you should care now. The law prevents this from going further.”
“It doesn’t prevent me from doing this.” When he bent his head, Taygete knew what he would do and did nothing to stop it.
His lips were just as pleasurable as she recalled and the kiss just as sweet, mastering her mind and consuming her senses as they clung to one another. The heat of it was like fire in her veins, burning down every wall of resistance it met.
She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, and he pulled her closer. The kiss grew with hunger. Like a wild animal who’d been caged for years, Taygete broke free, allowing her hands to ravenously touch him everywhere, mapping his body through his clothes.
He removed his jacket to give her better access, and she moaned at the heat she found so close to his body. She couldn’t recall ever having so much of it around her. She’d never been touched like this and now understood some of what she’d been denying herself.
“I don’t think I could ever stop.” His hands moved to her hips and traveled up her sides.
“Stop what?” she whispered against his mouth.
He took her bottom lip between his teeth and groaned. “Stop wanting you.”
Her eyes were already closed, and yet she tightened them farther when pain struck her heart. She yanked away from him and placed the back of her hand over her mouth. Disgust rose within her.
He touched her shoulder, and she jerked away.
“Don’t.” She lifted her hands to warn him away. Her stomach rolled, and she felt ready to vomit at the fact that she’d found any pleasure in his arms.
He stopped coming toward her. His eyes roamed her face before they turned hard. “Why are you fighting this?”
“Because it’s wrong!” she told him.
He moved then, which in turn caused Taygete to move until he had her backed into a wall. He stopped a foot away and placed his hands on either side of the wall, one hand by her head and the other by her side. He leaned in but didn’t touch her, yet it was enough to unnerve her.
He studied her intently, and Taygete tried not to give her emotions or thoughts away, though she knew some of it was visible in her eyes.
Whatever he saw made him frown. “Don’t pretend that you don’t feel the same as I.”
That could never be denied. She knew this, but that only made the matter worse. “You married my sister.”
“I wish I hadn’t.”
Her eyes widened. “How could you say that?”
There was anger in his features and voice. “Because it’s the truth. Maia deserved better than what I gave her.”
Taygete blanked her face at those words as the past rolled around her mind, filled with images of Maia during her visit to Southampton after she’d married. By all accounts, she’d seemed happy. “What do you mean? What did you do?”
His eyes softened but not by much. “It’s not what I did, but what I didn’t do.” He moved his hand to her cheek, caressing her gently just as his eyes softened further. “I didn’t love her.”
Taygete turned away, forcing his hand to fall, and tried to escape. He trapped her once more by placing his hands on the wall. “I don’t want to hear any more of this.”
He stepped closer, and his lips brushed her cheek. His voice was low, almost pained. “I should never have married her.”
“Stop this.” She pushed at his chest, yet she might as well have been pushing into a wall. He didn’t move. She turned her head away and told herself to ignore him, tried telling her mind to not listen, yet none of it worked. She still heard the words she dreaded.
“I should have married you.”
The pain hit her again as she recalled just how often she’d thought that herself. She hated to recall that year of Maia’s marriage and admit that while she’d been happy that Maia had married a man who would be faithful to her, Hugh had belonged to Taygete. She’d known this in her heart since the moment they’d met and had not been content to know she’d missed out on her chance at great love.
In her mind, she’d known that if she’d given herself a chance, she could have loved again, loved another man, yet even still, it would never have been the same, as intense a feeling at the day at the pond when her life had been given purpose after a kiss that had not been promised to her. She’d stolen it by giving him a wrong name.
Taygete had not been content, and now she knew it was the same for Hugh.
She’d wronged her sister from the beginning and now she knew that she’d stolen true happiness from Maia. “None of this matters. We can never marry. We can never go back. You chose Maia.”
He shook his head and, because of his proximity, she felt it. His lips were still brushing her cheek. “No, I chose my mother.”
She stilled, and he leaned away. She had no idea what he meant by his words. She’d only met the marchioness on a few occasions and had thought the woman nice, though she had sensed a sadness about her. Either way, all of it was simply more from the past and she wanted nothing to do with it. She wanted nothing to do with him. “I don’t care. It doesn’t matter.”
“She chose Maia,” Hugh went on as though she’d said nothing. “My mother was grieving my father’s loss. I thought that by marrying Maia, the woman she’d chosen, I could preserve her.”
His words saddened her heart as she pictured his mother again, but now with the knowledge that the woman’s sadness had been because of love lost. It was bittersweet that the marchioness had loved her husband so much that she’d not wanted to go on after his death.
Had they had the chance, would she and Hugh have been th
e same? Would that moment in the garden have led to a long life of overflowing happiness?
Such thoughts didn’t matter. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does matter, Taygete. It matters, because in my heart, I chose you and I fear Maia knew.”
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CHAPTER FOURTEEN
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Dear God. No words could hurt worse.
Tears burned Taygete’s eyes. “Please, you must stop this.”
He was on her again. His hands touched her cheek and lifted her head, and she saw the strength in his eyes before he spoke with finality. “We’ve barely begun.”
She froze and whispered, “What do you mean?”
“I’ll deny myself of you no more.”
She stared at him and wondered if he’d feel that way knowing the true reason she’d avoided him all these years.
He wouldn’t, she surmised. If he knew the truth, he’d likely hate her. She was the reason for their great loss. It was a truth she planned to take to her death, yet while she lived, she would keep it at the forefront of her mind to ensure that she never found happiness with a man, because she’d stolen that and more from her own sister.
A knock sounded on the door and Taygete moved away, thankful when Hugh didn’t stop her.
Her mother came into the room and if she thought it odd that they were alone, she didn’t show it. “I heard about what happened with Alcyone. I do apologize for her behavior,” she said to Hugh.
“There’s no need.” Hugh was moving, but Taygete didn’t look at him. Instead, she tried to think of a way to leave the room without it being obvious just how much she wished to flee.
She heard when Hugh fell into his chair before he spoke. “Alcyone may have found the perfect suitor.” He then went on to tell her mother about Fortiere’s family.
“I know of them,” Mary said. “Fortiere’s father is trying to buy our company.”
All thoughts of running from the room fled her mind at those words. She looked over and noticed Hugh’s light demeanor had changed. His hands rested on the chair arm and he gave the ends a few taps with his fingers as he thought.
Taygete pulled her mind away from how much she’d enjoyed those hands touching her and turned to her mother. “I didn’t know anyone was trying to buy the family company. Would Titan truly sell?” There had been a time when her brother had wanted nothing to do with the Bellenger business. Their father had been an odd man. There had been times when he was distant and then times when Taygete had felt as though a great ocean separated them, or even a world. She’d at times felt a dark presence around him and had known that Titan had felt it as well, blaming the company and their father’s ambition for it.
There had been a coldness in their father that he’d never truly shown to his family. He’d guarded them against the worst of it.
To be a different man, Titan had tried to marry for love, but sadly the woman he’d fancied had fallen for someone else. Jennie Smithson had left Titan for a man who could give her a title. It hadn’t mattered that Titan’s wealth had been grander than the lord's. Jennie had chosen the man who would help her rise amongst the ton.
And since the day she’d left, Titan had not been the same.
She recalled Hugh telling her of some of her family’s trouble and of danger.
She touched her heart as fear raced through her. She looked at Hugh and found that he was watching her and probably aware of the questions running through her mind. His gaze was intense and yet unreadable.
“I don’t believe Titan wishes to sell,” Mary said.
Hugh turned to Mary. "I hope Alcyone is not too upset with my response to her. If she is, I would ask that you tell her my only concern is for her safety and happiness.”
Taygete smiled softly at his humility. It wasn’t often that a man of his position openly admitted to caring about another’s thoughts. Part of her knew he was hoping to get Taygete alone once more, but she also suspected that Hugh really meant what he’d said. He didn’t want Alcyone upset, only to be more cautious.
“Oh, Alcyone understands completely,” Mary rose. “But I’ll make sure to tell her your words.” She smiled and curtseyed.
Hugh stood once she was gone. “We better go and retrieve your sister. We’ll talk along the way.”
She was glad he’d not denied her more information on her family and followed him out of the house once more even though she was still nervous about being alone with him.
She had no illusion that he’d given up so easily. He’d sounded quite resolved in his conclusion, as though the matter were closed and the outcome inevitable.
But Taygete knew she’d have to find a way to keep him away and if it came to telling her dark secret, she would.
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CHAPTER FIFTEEN
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The clouds opened and began to pour seconds before they opened the door.
Hugh turned to Taygete as she began to tie her ribbons to her bonnet underneath her chin, ready to offer to leave her behind, but he knew she would not be left. She wanted to talk and at the moment, he didn’t want to be away from her.
If he were being frank, he would say that he never wished to part with her again, but he knew that day would come eventually. He just hoped that they could be together for a time.
He knew the arrangement he offered would never be satisfying to either of them, not in the long run, but for a time, he wanted to hold her and touch her, even claim her, for she’d been the one he should have claimed to begin with.
“Ready?” She glanced in his direction before turning to stare out the door.
He imagined that this was what life would have been like if Taygete had been the one he’d chosen. They’d have left the house together to make social calls with their friends or to make appearances at various events.
He’d have watched her get ready in the morning, dismissing the maid so that he could assist her himself. He’d have draped her with diamonds and blue aquamarine stones to match her eyes.
And he’d have kissed her whenever he wished and wherever. He’d have kissed her everything, every part of her body, stealing her into dark corners at balls and dinner parties just to get her alone.
He’d never wanted to do those things with Maia. While he felt some guilt, it wasn’t enough to steer him away from Taygete. He and Maia had not pretended to be in love with one another. They’d simply tried to find their own version of happiness with one another, always striving to pleasure the other in the highest measure.
And doing it all without love.
Yet he’d put every trace of his feelings for Taygete in the kiss he’d shared with her in the office. He’d not said the words, knowing she wasn’t ready to hear them, but he’d wanted her to feel them.
He sensed that she did and perhaps that was just one of the reasons she feared what was happening between them, but Hugh was no fool.
She was hiding something.
Her reaction to his confession that he would never stop wanting her had been… confusing. Yet, he’d always known his Taygete to be a complicated woman. She’d not been wearing stockings when they’d met, and though her family had more money than any one family should, she worked endlessly.
He’d asked his staff about her when he’d been home in Southampton, wanting to know if anyone had heard of her. Luckily, his housekeeper had hired on a former soldier as a footman before his arrival and the young man had met Taygete himself. He’d confirmed what her brother had said. The sailor had heard stories about Taygete whispered in the hospital, the beautiful angel of both light and darkness, sometimes bringing pain and at other times taking the pain away, but doing it all to see that every man left
in some measure of wholeness. It had been clear that the soldier thought highly of her, and Hugh had almost wished himself another man, one who’d been under her care and had been given the pleasure of knowing her… and a chance to make her his wife.
He realized he’d been staring at her for a time and hadn’t said a word.
He settled his hat over his head. “After you.”
The footman held an umbrella over their heads and then they were off to Lorena’s.
“Do you think Fortiere behind my family’s troubles?” Taygete asked. She’d started them off on the most impersonal topic she could find, probably because she didn’t wish to speak of anything personal, and possibly because she was worried.
“I’m not sure,” he said honestly. “But I plan to find out. I’ll look into the Fortiere family and we’ll know the truth before things move further between Alcyone and Samuel.”
She’d settled into a corner of the carriage, close to a window, with her eyes on him and her hands resting on her lap. “Do you think you can stop Alcyone from being with him? Even I noticed how taken she was with him. I’d hate to think him dishonest.”
Hugh crossed his arms. “We won’t know how to act until we have more information. But I pray Samuel is honest in his feelings and if that is so, then I will do everything I can to see them happy.” He’d not let them become what he and Taygete were. Two people in love who could never have each other.
Taygete blinked away as though she’d glimpsed his thoughts. “How do you plan to go about finding information on Fortiere?”
“I’ve a few friends who know the family better. The Earl of Jeanshire is one of them.”
“Jeanshire.” She whispered the name as if trying to recall a fact about him. She looked at him once more. “Is he engaged to one of the Society Sisters?”